Time or Quality Time?

When President Obama called for Dr. Martin Luther King's holiday to be a "national day of service" or when he endorsed January as National Mentoring Month, he didn't tell us how to squeeze 25 hours out of a 24 hour day? When Michelle Obama highlighted mentoring at risk youth as the nexus of these emphases, she didn't tell us how to maintain a rested complexion with less than 8 hours sleep every night.

Most of us would agree the crises facing American youth, such as juvenile crime, substance abuse, high school dropout rates and an epidemic of childhood obesity require the time honored intervention of caring adults as mentors. We just may not be sure there is enough of us to go around.

Human beings are social. Daily interaction with each other is a kind of socialization and mentoring. We may argue that using our spheres of influence to impact youth positively is naturally occurring and therefore is mentoring.

That perspective begs the question, "does it count and is mentoring on the run enough?" Does mentoring involve time or quality time? Does mentoring involve a regular commitment to interaction with a young person? How do you negotiate time commitments to the youth in your life?

Please share your thoughts.

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Introduction - January: National Mentoring Month

This blog is dedicated to all community volunteers who care about youth as well as youth development professionals who are committed to positive youth outcomes. This forum can also help struggling parents as well as the dedicated teachers, social workers, clergy and juvenile probation officers that desire more effective ways of connecting with young people. I hope to facilitate a conversation to inspire and enable all caring adults to engage youth in healthy relationships that lead them to make positive, even life changing decisions about their futures.

I remember my mother, grandmother, teachers, church leaders and other community members invested their time and energy in me when I was young to grow my skills, my mind, my character and eventually my capability as a leader. It was likely the same for you.

Many youth grow up starved for adult attention and suffer the inevitable results associated with the lack of positive adult interaction in their lives. Youth development requires caring adults to lead the way for youth especially those at risk of dropping out of school or engaging in risky behavior such as substance abuse, early sexual debut or juvenile crime.

The body of literature reveals that mentoring is the caring, consistent relationship with a trusting bond between mentor and mentee that is paramount in supporting the development process or change in youth. Here's what we know based on mentor studies conducted by the U.S. Departments of Education and Justice. Mentor/ mentee relationships having sustainable long term effects:

• last at least one year in duration;
• are based on mutual interests;
• mentees see mentors more as friends rather than authority figures.

What is not well studied or known is how to stimulate that bond using a model that can be repeated in many settings.

So let's begin our conversation by discussing the qualities of successful mentors. You may wish to share stories about the qualities the mentors in your life possess.